part of you belongs to me now. i'll see you in your dreams.

i could do this with you all day.

i like all things that are lovely

and those things are subject to my own interpretation. uh, thank you.

i know what to do and i do it well..

had Mechanical Animals on repeat all day. this, by far is my favorite off that album.

video is compiled of scenes from Fargo, dontchaknow.

Riddle Me This:

Poppy is in a relationship with a great guy, Pierre. by all accounts, he is perfect. [and just the type of guy she needs in her life.] he has a great job as an ad exec for a fortune 500 company based in the east coast. she, of course- is a model.

her "usuals" are mostly those artsy, rocker types you cant really bring home to mom. but after about 6 months of passion, great sex, bickering, infedelities?, even better make-up sex, tears- for the most part she realizes these aren't the guys for her. she notices the majority of them need her more than she needs them, she then gets bored, turned-off and moves on to the next within another 2 or 3 months. same destructive pattern..

next, she meets Pierre. someone with a head on his shoulders. someone with an education. someone who realizes and treats her like the princess she is and deserves to be treated like. he flew her to Paris at the beginning of summer to meet his family, he showed her all around the city of lights- the places that were just his, the places he loved as a kid, his sanctuaries. and she loved him for it. and he helped her.

something she was not used to. however, during their trip to the city of love she couldnt help but feel something missing and found herself thinking about her most recent fling. a young man called Julian. he was younger than her, crazy [just like the rest], didnt know where he was going but having a great time figuring it out, didnt really take her too seriously, didnt connect on "those" types of levels- but Great in bed. she was always having trouble with Jules. break up to make up, he wanted her she was busy. she wanted him, he was uninterested. but they always came back.

now in her new relationship, she should be happy. her mom Loves Pierre. Pierre's mom Adores Poppy. he spoils her like she has never even dreamed of.

But- something's missing.

which brings me to my point:

why is it that when we're with someone who by most accounts is perfect for us, we get bored? why is it that when we hate to love someone, we think that is what love is?

i have been guilty of it myself at least twice in the past, the feeling of not being able to live without the person. the feeling of not wanting anything more than to just sit with the person and "be." feeling sad if said person asks for alone time as if it were a sign of loss of love. i think Lauryn Hill said it best; When It Hurts So Bad, Why's It Feel So Good?

Ladies [and gents] that is NOT what love is. dont get me wrong, i still dont know what love is, but i know what it is not. love cannot be all these emotions and insecurities that make us sick to our stomach. i feel like at least, it is a sign of respect for the other person, a mutual agreement that with all of lifes options we're sticking with each other. sure there's hotties out there- Every Where. but having that connection with someone that just feels right even in your pajamas, even with a runny nose, even with a bad hair day, even on your period, even on boring days is unbeatable and undeniably sexy.

thats the kinda love i want.

i want someone who gets me. gets my silly fart jokes, and isnt turned off by 'em. appreciates my desire to continue learning. someone who i cant stop thinking about, but isnt threatened by my girl time and alone days. understands that i am still growing as a person. someone who isnt going to depend on me. someone who can roll with the punches and doesnt get quiet and uncomfortable in new situations. someone who can keep up, and keep me interested. someone who doesnt mind staying in on a saturday night in our undies watching scary movies and rolling blunts. someone who'll bake with me. someone who isnt threatened by my past. someone who loves my painting and my poems.

yes the list may be long. maybe far-fetched, but that doesnt mean it's impossible. let's not be afraid to be alone, to not have people busting down our doors on a daily. lets get comfy in our own skin and learn who we really are as women and what we'll be able to offer another person When the time comes. i think if we start doing this, like on a conscious level- it'll make things easier on a moment to moment basis. "mr. right" may not come banging our door down tonight, tomorrow or even next year, but i honestly believe there is a person out there for everyone and when it is our time, It Will Be.

Hello, I Love You.

Who: Stacey Mark

What: photographer, former photo director for Nylon Magazine

Why: duh!

crush of the moment; Ms. Mark.

just check out the hottness-es she captures in that 'just picked up the camera and this is what i got' look. seems like something your man would shoot after hours of messy hairpulling rolling in the sheets.

the lighting is brilliant.

the grain, intoxicating.

this woman is really on her shit. and on the come up. and all the more amazing that she has only been shooting her own photos for a few years now. i guess the saying holds true; You Either Got IT, Or You Dont.

while on a trip to the Toronto Film Festival during her last few years at Nylon, she picked up the camera to shoot actress Asia Argento and the rest was history. Ms. Argento didnt even know that Stacey had never photographed before! [not that that mattered]

inspired by fantasy and playing with her alter-ego, Stacey rarely photographs men- and im not sure that any of you mind. it really seems like she understands the beauty in the imperfections. every woman is beautiful, simply for being a woman [sorry guys, puss-say power!] even while photographing nudity, it never comes off as raunchy, only absolutely enticing, our form, our curves, our delicasies, mmm mmm! and as sexy as these photos are, imagine this: she feels that all her shots are 'self-portraits', only, of other women. hott!